Sometimes the Thought Does Not Count
Holiday Gifts That Should Probably Be Kept From Giving
My oh my, the holiday season is now in full bloom. And so is gift giving, with many people exchanging gifts well into the first few weeks of January. Some people are excellent gift-givers — knowing exactly what recipients will love and need. Others are more of the last-minute sort, rushing to the store at the midnight hour to get whatever thingamajig they can stuff in a bag. With gift giving, we hear it is the thought and intent that counts. However, sometimes we might as well not have even made the effort. Except for gag gifts or genuine “Remove me from the exchange next year” gifts, here are some gift ideas just not worth the effort.
NoPhone (Great If You Want To Have Someone Block Your Number)
It was one of the (not-so) likable products on Shark Tank — the NoPhone. Imagine a cutting-edge cellular device that does well. . nothing. The NoPhone simply was a big bulk piece of plastic that failed to land a deal with investors in Season 7 of the hit business show.
Designed as a prank gift to encourage people to cut back on excessive smart device use, the item comes as an original plastic block or an upgraded “selfie” phone that is essentially a giant mirror. Unless you are trying to get a laugh out of a friend (or have someone block your number on their real phone), perhaps you should save your money here.
A Special Briefcase
Do you have any friends who are traveling in the new year? Any family members who need an extra bag to get all of their holiday items home? Well, certain Novelty Briefcases will not usually do the trick.
This type of undergarment item could bring genuine laughs or full-winded scowls. You may want to think twice even if this is a well-intended gimmick. We are batting a little below the belt here.
Candy Is Not Always Sweet
Common wisdom is that most conflicts can be solved with candy. However, this is not always the case. Think twice if you order some unthinkable prank candy gifts. It is hard to see how sour cream and onion crickets will soften hearts(it may make some close friends with twisted humor smile).
Perhaps you can try barbeque-flavored larvae for those acquaintances who keep inviting themselves to your holiday parties. But please be careful delivering goods like these, lest you want to be labeled the worst type of scrooge.
Don’t Be a Fake(Even as a Prank)
Some of us may have been living under a rock to have never realized there are actual prank lottery ticket gimmicks. That’s right, you can buy very convincing fake lottery tickets right on Amazon!
To many, this one just begs the question as to why. Would you not be better just making a “free back massage” coupon out of construction paper or offering Monopoly money? Some may find this as a funny gag gift, but one has to wonder could there be legal issues involved? Who is to say that some gift recipient might challenge your prank in court, demanding you pay them the winning dollar sum that emerged in an alternate universe?
Worst Ever Awards
Can you imagine receiving a “worst ever” award? Would that not be upsetting to some level, even if just a prank? It is no joke, they do generate these prank awards. One of the Internet’s hottest is the “Worst Boss Gag Gift.” You would want to avoid giving to any boss unless the boss has given out larva BBQ snacks as a seasonal gift before.
Special of the Month (Oh Wait, Pickle That)
Monthly subscriptions are typically thoughtful, they are the gift that keeps on giving. But be sure you really know that the person will enjoy that monthly surprise. Now, imagine some monthly subscriptions like pickles. Someone needs a deep passion for such quirky items.
Multiple producers offer such subscriptions for pickles alone. And the sky is the limit for other subscription services out there, so imagine the nontraditional giver renewing a subscription or offering a whole new category every giving season. However, givers should use caution as these gifts can either satisfy the esoteric aficionado or repulse the not-so-interested. If you feel a pickle-of-the-month subscription is the best gift this year, just be sure you do not find yourself in a pickle.
So, we have examined a few gifts that may not so quickly brighten recipients’ eyes upon unwrapping. From undesirable candies to eccentric monthly subscriptions, these examples help us remember that gifts are not always what makes the season bright. The best gifts are both given and received with love, care, and brightness as gift sharing is but one way that hearts and souls connect. And remember some of the best gifts do not come wrapped with fancy bows and strings. Some gifts, like a story told by a warm fireplace or a hug from a loved one, are priceless and stay with the recipient for a lifetime.
