Ode To Ultra-Processed, Addictive, Irresistible Foods
My Own Vices I Cannot Quite Escape
Oh my, sweet multi-flavored jelly beans! I cannot get enough of you!
When I purchase a bag of you, huge size, I tell myself I will only eat a handful a day(just a couple hundred extra calories).
One handful becomes two, becomes three! Soon, all the calories burnt from my daily steps and exercise regimens are suddenly replanted from the delicious strawberry, cherry, and orange super sugar capsules! Do I need to brush my teeth again if I have three handfuls or four?
And, oh wonderful, ye sweet classic conversation hearts that come at famous holidays!
Some people consider these simply pieces of chalk!
But for others, these little tokens of love and sweetness are little morsels of multi-dextrose stimulants of joy and positive energy. You just cannot get enough handfuls and bags (praying your body has enough insulin).
Then, to counterbalance those masses of sugars, let’s bring in some other substance.
Like sweet, amazing, wondrous pizza rolls!
Oh, the delicious doughy microwavable treats that just melt in your mouth with flavors of cheese and some meat-like particles. They bear the semblance of some special super-quick and easy protein-based entree. But don’t pay any attention to the nutrition facts that show how the cholesterol and fats are all piling up.
And let’s not forget those amazing mini corn dogs!
Oh, an American classic compacted into ready in less than a minute! And who cares if you bathe them in ketchup, mustard, or ranch dressing?
Speaking of dipping, let’s microwave some fries to go with those corn dogs!
And we can get all of the extra dip calories that we want! Pay no attention to the extra sodium and fat!
Can I top off these super (not-so-healthy) entrees with more sweet desserts?
Don’t mind if I sneak a cookie, two, or five!
We can sneak in a few bites of cake or cookie dough while we’re at it!
And we have not brought in the essential delectable dish yet! Some ice cream concoction so sublime!
It’s dairy and protein, right? Don’t mind the extra sugar and fat!
Oh, yes, all of these foods and more are so wonderful and delicious(among too many others to name). However, you must eat sparingly as they are not so great for your waistline or various bodily systems.
An ode to these and many more, my secret difficult vices. I will savor you candies, not-so-artery-friendly entrees, and delicious desserts only once in awhile.
Note: Many many foods are available that are much more healthy and just as delicious. Other odes may be coming soon.
